Cutting Ties

Guys, I skipped a gist.

I forgot to mention … while I was out of town, I went back on the dating app, Hinge and matched with someone. We ended up going on a date. Lets call him Dave. I’ll save Dave’s story for another post.

Lets not get distracted. Back to Fred’s gist.

In the previous post, I mentioned that I called things off with Fred while I was out of town for Memorial Weekend. I ended the situationship via a text message. An approach I was avoiding. But it had to happen that way. His response to my message was “Oh wow, very well then”.

I took my L and moved on.

I got back from my trip on Thursday and that evening, I got a text from Fred. It read:

“Hey, I hope you made it back to town safely. I didn’t bother to reach out cos I know you were out of town.

I understand your point in the message you sent to me but I think we had so much more together and having things go this way isn’t just right.

I’ll like to meet up and discuss or at the very least talk on the phone. I hope you can grant that.”

Personally, when my mind is made up… that’s it. I rarely look back nor go back on my words.

When I saw his text, I did the obvious. I rolled my eyes. I ignored the message which is my standard default. When I’m done with someone, you’re good as dead to me.

I called my friend, Sammy and told her what had happened. She was ablet to convince me to hear him out.

I mean, why not.. I really had nothing to lose but I was certain I wasn’t going back on my words.

I replied his text hours later and said “Hey, we can talk on the phone“.

That evening, Fred called.

We spoke for almost 30minutes and during the call, we talked about almost nothing. He said “I had always imagined you’ll be frustrated with me. Sometimes, I could understand why and other times, I couldn’t…but I see where you’re coming from and I understand that you’re trying to protect your interest”.

Surprised? me too!

Fred said he actually saw this coming.. hmm! I’m sure he did…or maybe not? He also said, while he saw it coming, he was hoping things would move differently in a different direction that’ll it won’t get to this.

Is it possible that Fred is scared of commitment? I don’t know.

Back story… When I met Fred, he mentioned he used to be engaged; however, he called off this engagement due some reasons I won’t be sharing. We don’t care about Fred’s past relationship… or do we?

Anyways, moving on… He did not strike me as someone who was scared of commitments.

Oh, he also said “I am not trying to be an asshole. I’m not trying to waste your time, I just couldn’t move faster than I was moving …and then, I stopped moving”.

I asked why?

He responded and said “you have a unique space in my life, you get me naturally, your temperament is good for mine and vice versa.

There was a long pause. He then continued and said “I have to show up and show out. I cannot come into your life and say I’m not in for this right now, I have to show up day one knowing what to do and being prepared to do it”.

Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

If so, you’re right… the kid in the picture.

He went on and said “I know you mentioned you had a kid on our first date but I didn’t want to judge a book by its cover. The first day I met you, there was something compelling about you and I wanted to give things a chance. The chance was a good decision. I did not have the magic formular to arrive at the destination you want me to… in the time that you want to. I understand that posed some frustration to you.

I was mute while he kept ranting. Seems like he was trying to convince me that he wasn’t a bad person. I don’t think Fred is a bad person but I’m sure he’s a piece of shit!

Oh, I forgot to mention…Fred ended the conversation with “I wanted to tell you all these things in person but I did not have the courage to. I don’t want you to be heartbroken or ask you to give me more time. I really like you and I have been saying the same bullshit”

At least, the bullshitter knows he’s bullshitting…. that’s progress.

My response to his speech was “This is all a merry-go-round”. I wished him goodnight and hung up.

A few minutes later, I received a text from Fred that read “Glad we got to talk today a bit. I will call you tomorrow if that’s okay.”

My response was “Totally okay :)”

Fred did not call the next day but he sent a text to check in to make sure I was okay. The whole process was becoming exhausting so I ignored.

I traveled abroad for a month. While I was aboard, I reconnected with an old flame…sweet story for another day 😉

I got home after my long trip abroad and I received a letter in the mail.

Your thoughts are as good as mine…the letter was from Fred!!

To be Continued!!!

As always, thank you for visiting my blog and reading my posts.

I look forward to reading your comments/thoughts 🙂

Cheers!

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